The Writers Coffeehouse for April 2016

By Dawn Byrne

Janice Gable-Bashman and Jon McGoran teamed up to lead the Philly Liars Club Writers Coffeehouse in Willow Grove PA. Topics? Character Voice and Outlining. They answered questions, and Jon threw in information on marketing.

Examples of distinct voice done well can be found in J.K. Rowling’s books. The very different voices of the alternating main characters in All American Boys by Jason Reynolds and Brendan Kiely, ring distinct in the book’s characters with their similar backgrounds, living in the same place. “Be true to your character,” said Janice. Make sure the similar persons you design are individuals so the reader can easily tell them apart.

Jon spoke of economy in writing. The voice of a character should show the story, so exposition isn’t needed. You don’t want to undermine your character by violating their POV. If you need something explained in your story, let the character bring up the information needed and address it through his/her dialogue or internal thoughts in a way that’s natural and fluid.

Be conscious of how often you switch POV. Color-coding your manuscript is a technique that can identify where each POV character is in the story and how often you’re in that view. The different POV will pop off the page so you can see if there’s a balance. Scrivener and other software work well for this, but so do Post-it notes and 3x5 cards. Outlining helps in establishing your characters. You should understand your characters a bit before writing the outline, but you can find out more about them as you build the outline. Janice, while outlining, sometimes comes up with dialogue for her characters. She stops outlining and writes the dialogue down as it comes to her. A gift! For her last book, it took three months to create her outline, but she did less editing after the story was written.

Having an outline saves time when an editor or agent asks for changes. It also prevents bad surprises for the author by keeping information consistent and easy to check. Make sure when you do those changes that you also reflect them in the outline for later reference. If you’re creating a series, having a record of the completed books in an outline or other form, makes it easier to keep information throughout the series uniform.

But Janice and Jon agreed: “Do whatever works for you.” Steven James swears in Story Trumps Structure that one shouldn’t outline. Biographical character sketches should contain deep stuff about characters beyond their physical form and what they like to eat. Interviewing them can enable you to find their voice. For each character, you should know their unique POV, even if you’re not writing in their POV. Whatever happened in the character’s life before the story will show in their dialogue and actions. Even birth order is important with family characters.

A question about dialect came up. Suggestions: Find a few words to repeat to relay a character’s dialect, but go light with it. Alternate spelling doesn’t look good on the page, it bogs down the writing and tires the reader. The cadence of words spoken in English by a non-fluent character displays their background to readers. But don’t stereotype your people. There’s a fine line with this, so be sparing with colloquialisms and dialects. When sprinkling in non-English words, they shouldn’t need translation because of context.

Keith Strunk joined the meeting as Jon shared information about BookBub. “It’s huge. Seems to be a powerful tool,” said Jon. An email marketing tool for ebooks, BookBub works on price reduction to stimulate sales. Its thriller list alone has 2.5 million addresses. Similar services, like The Fussy Librarian, are smaller than BookBub, which averages 26,000 downloads. So for the prorated cost of their book, some authors have had success. But for ebooks priced at 99 cents, Jon suggested we consider what percentage of their buyers will purchase another book by that author priced above 99 cents. Harlan Ellison believes you should never give your stuff away. That may be what authors who go the 99 cents route with BookBub are doing in hopes of other sales.

MSWL Manuscript Wish List is a 12-hour pitch on Twitter to literary agents. Authors put up a tweet to see who likes their pitch. Agents who are looking to represent an author may request pages of a manuscript. How important, really, are business cards? “Networking is about touch. Lots and lots of touch. And that’s what business cards are,” Keith answered. A card is a memory, so you are “marketing memory” with your picture on the card. It’s about interaction with people, and a card can create a connection. But, “Networking is always a long term thing.”

Jon had a signing for his new book, Dust Up, after the meeting at the front of the store. Janice will be signing at the Barnes & Noble Teen Book Festival in Neshaminy PA on June 11th. Look for the many local conferences coming up. A few are ThrillerFest XI in New York July 6-9, the Philadelphia Writers Conference in Philadelphia June 10-12, the Annual Pennwriters Conference in Lancaster, PA May 20-22, and Noircon 2016 in Philadelphia June 15-16.

There will be no Coffeehouse in May, although it resumes June 26th, noon to 2 PM with an additional hour for networking. Thanks for setting up this SJWG road trip, Sir Glenn Walker. Thank you Gail Priest for driving. The Liars are great, and so are you.

Facebook, Web Design, and Dialogue at the Writers Coffeehouse

By Dawn Byrne

Author Kelly Simmons led the February Liars Club Writers Coffeehouse in the Willow Grove PA Barnes & Noble. Her first topic? How writers can use Facebook to promote their books.

Readers are on Facebook. Build relationships with them for lasting online benefits. Ask questions and have them share answers to pull engagement to your site. On average it takes ten impressions from people who like, have heard about or bought your book, to make a sale. Word-of-mouth through social media and other sources is most valuable to prompt interest and keep it going. Too bad we can’t really control it.

Experiment only with small amounts of money. Paying to boost Facebook posts for advertising your book isn’t too beneficial. E-commerce is. Remember, Facebook controls your author page. If you do boost your posts, don’t do it to an existing one. Create a new post and make sure it’s a good one. Kelly is experimenting with targeting her audience for specific posts, narrowing her audience to get the most for her money. She’s still not sure if this works on Facebook.

Facebook ads for authors are good for branding but are a long term investment, and creating them can be difficult. Try different visuals for promoting your book, and make sure they’re sized correctly on the page or ad. Faces tend to be very eye-catching. Some graphic design sites are free, like Canva. Blurbs, reviews and endorsements are great as headliners with your book cover. Compare your book with similar authors. Ex. “If you liked…, you’ll like my book.” A ‘Buy’ button on Facebook’s ad manager isn’t as desirable as the ‘Learn More’ button. A ‘Learn More’ button gets interaction from more people.

An audience member asked about other social media. Kelly uses Twitter for real life feed, but communicates with male friends more on LinkedIn. Instagram draws mostly a young audience and women. People use Instagram on their phone to view feed because it’s pictures with only some text. Facebook and Instagram rely on visuals, which draw more attention than text, so Facebook beats Twitter in its success to promote book sales.

Touching on website design, Kelly suggests thinking visually and owning your pictures to build a website that’s unique to you. Wix and Weebly are simplistic programs for designing visuals. Squarespace is a bit harder to use. Camera+ is for smart phones. GIMP and Freeware are like Photoshop. Photoshop Elements and PicMonkey are two other options. Unsplash and iStockphoto are downloadable picture options, but taking your own pictures is best. For further help with web design check out blogs like: Amy Porterfield and Sarah Von Bargen.

Kathryn Craft shared in discussing dialogue. It should do multiple things. Go beyond suggesting context by adding subtext that shows the emotional reality of the character. Everything has context and subtext and feeds into the conversation. Janice Gable Bashman said, “Listen to what’s not being said.” Scenes and the sequels between them are now done at the same time. Use dialogue to continue the story and layer it with action. The situation comedy "Frazier" is an example of great dialogue. The two brother characters are very alike, yet their dialogue uniquely distinguishes each.

Dialect can be done in different ways. Janice handled this in her book by simply referring to a character’s accent. Some authors start with dialect and then continue the story without it. Keith Strunk said pacing and cadence of dialogue allows readers to pick up a character’s accent.

Kelly’s tricks to learn good dialogue:

1. Listen to award winning radio commercials

2. Watch Aaron Sorkin shows

3. Read screenplays

4. Write down what you hear from people

As the meeting broke up, Keith videotaped volunteers for the Liars Club Coffeehouse Video. We gave our names and explained why we write. Keith’s prompts calmed my nerves before I spoke. He let me view and listen to myself for assurance that I wasn’t too bad. I left the meeting happy about myself, writing and other writers. Sadly, the Coffeehouse won’t meet in March.

Liars Club Writers Coffeehouse Back Again for 2016

By Dawn Byrne

Jonathan Maberry led the Liars Club Writers Coffeehouse in the Willow Grove PA Barnes & Noble via Skype. Keith Strunk hosted the Liar-filled meeting, which included Marie Lamba, Janice Gable-Bashman, Kelly Simmons, and Kathryn Craft. One of the South Jersey Writers' Group’s recent third Thursday speakers, Donna Galanti, fit well into the nucleus of Club members.

Jonathan began with information on the Writers Coffeehouses. There are nine active ones and more are popping up in the US, and other countries. It started with this group that now meets in Willow Grove. When thanked for starting the Coffeehouse, Jonathan reminded us that the Liars Club started the Coffeehouse, and that he is just a part of the Club. He shares hosting duties with the Coffeehouse in San Diego, where he now lives. “Community matters to writers,” he said, after exchanging familiar and sincere greetings with us. His fondness for our group showed in his face and words.

Questions for Jonathan matched the subject of how to get the word out about your book once it’s published: Blogging in your genre can be the grass roots in promoting your work. Subscribe to other blogs who read yours to making connections with potential readers. Goodreads and LinkedIn are a must. Reach out to writer conferences that do your subject and genre; you’ll meet people who can be helpful. Your writer’s platform on social media and how it’s maintained brings awareness of your book to audiences. Synching up your Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn accounts makes posting content easier. Starting a conversation is vital for your audience to make a connection with you. “The author is the brand,” said Jonathan. But don’t promise things that cost you a lot. If people are interested in you, they are more likely to buy your book.

Jonathan suggested multi-platform to promote anthologies. They don’t sell well, but anthologies can engage readers and get audiences interested in you and your other work.

Interviewers don’t always read your book, so give them a cheat sheet of questions to ask ahead of time. Making it easy for them, can make you popular to work with. Give one or two takeaways, that aren’t your plot, to make a memorable engagement with potential readers.

To learn how to do a podcast or book trailer, watch and listen to them. Trailers should be one-minute long, with strong production. After Jonathan had to end his Skype visit, Keith took advantage of the computer to show Kerry Gans’ trailer for her book, “The Witch of Zal.” Keith and Kerry had both worked on it. Donna is also a resource for making a trailer. Check out the one for her book, “Joshua and the Lightning Road.”



Two terms new to me: LookBook, where actors are put into your characters’ roles; and sizzle reel, which requires voiceovers and is expensive because so much goes into it. But the most interesting take away for me, was Jonathan’s advice to read out loud your edited, polished work. Listen to the polished voice of it. Study it, analyses it and contrast it with your original draft. This can help with your next work.

As always, Jonathan shared information on the current markets and trends: Graphic novels, the original ones that don’t feature superheroes, targeting girls are much in demand; pitch yours like a regular novel. Cross genre works are still hot. “I’m seeing a bit of a decline in memoir,” said Jonathan. But real life fiction is huge. Horror is starting to build in mainstream audiences.

Don’t be too specific with your plot when agents ask for summaries of books not yet written. “Be interesting but vague,” said Jonathan. He also highlighted the importance of having an agent: “If it wasn’t for my agent, I wouldn’t be in California.”

March 7, agent Marie Lamba is doing a First Page Workshop and answering questions on a panel for the SCBWI in Eastern, PA. May 20-22 is the Pennwriters Conference in Lancaster, PA. Jonathan and Kathryn will be keynote speakers and Donna will present workshops on craft and marketing.

Kelly Simmons took suggestions for next month’s Coffeehouse. She’ll be leading it, and selling her new book, “One More Day.” The trailer for it is cool.


Remember, no matter how many Sundays are in a month, the Coffeehouse always meets the last Sunday of each month from noon to 3 PM, unless a holiday gets in the way. It’s worth the trip over the bridge and through the city for us South Jerseyans. Three hours of shop talk and cohering with professional and upcoming writers is an exhilarating experience. And, my favorite, it’s FREE.

My First Time as a Professional Liar

By Jessica Hunter

People ask me what my story is about and all of a sudden I'm at a complete loss of words. It's like when someone asks: What's your favorite song? And all of a sudden your brain goes dead, and you can't even think of the last song you heard let alone which one is your favorite. Song? What's a song? This is exactly what happened to me when I attended the Liars Club this past Sunday, and it taught me a valuable lesson. But first let me go back to the beginning. To the moment I entered the den.

"We're going to sit in the front," SJWG Membership Director Glenn Walker said as we walked into the room. Little did I know, he meant the front front. As in the bright blue table that faces everyone else. The place where the professionals sit. (i.e the people who actually know what they're talking about.)

"You are a professional. If you act like a professional, then you are a professional," he told me when I expressed my concern. As I contemplated my choice, I asked myself, what is it that makes an author a professional? Is it the fact that you’ve published your stories, or is it your passion, your drive, the hours you spend doing the one thing that eventually gets you published - writing. If it’s the latter then yes, I am a professional.

Feeling slightly more confident, yet anxious, I took a seat at the table. Fellow SJWG member Bruce Capoferri offered me some reassurance. "I look in the mirror every morning and say Bruce, you are a professional salesman. Act like it." It reminded me of something Glenn mentioned earlier. "If it's not there, build it."

I needed to build the confidence that I belonged here, or at least fake it ‘til I make it, right? Honestly, I don't know why I was so afraid. It's not like everyone was going to chuck their books and pens at me. However, the room was filing with faces that I would probably see again. And I really wanted to make a good impression— in other words, not say anything stupid.

"What could you possibly say that would be stupid?" Glenn said. He was like the life coach I’ve always wanted.

The meeting started and with it my nerves hit overdrive. Sweaty palms, pounding chest, my thoughts tumbling over one another - we're introducing ourselves if you couldn't tell. But then something wonderful happened. I realized that everyone was just as nervous as I was.

"I panicked," said Dawn Byrne, fellow SJWG member.

"I feel like I'm having a heart attack," said one woman.

“Fake it 'til you make it!” someone shouted.

And then Keith Strunk put the icing on it all. "I’m not afraid to look dumb. Obviously."

I couldn't believe it. All of these established writers were feeling exactly what I was feeling. We were all in the same boat.

Now that the ice was broken, the group started talking about networking— get to know people not their pages, don’t pimp your writing, establish a network before you have something to sell. I was getting so many great notes. Just as I’m jotting down something Keith is saying, I realize that he’s speaking to me. Like he literally just asked me a question. It was then that I realized I wasn’t just a silent observer taking notes. These people had accepted me into their group. I was one of them, I was feeling on top of the world, and then the networking happened.

The first part was great. I spoke to Jon McGoran about our shared habit of writing ideas while driving. I spoke to someone else about yoga and language. I was on such a high. And then I was asked the one thing I didn't want to be asked. "So what's your story about?"

My entire brain shut down. I began babbling and hacking at my story. What is this nonsense you're saying? I thought. The guy was being so nice and patient as he listened to my rambling, but I could tell he was thoroughly confused. He had no idea what my book was about, and it sounded like I didn't know either. In fact I had somehow given him the wrong idea entirely. Just explain the themes, I thought, but even that came out a mess. He was asking all of the right questions geared to help me, all of the questions an agent would ask, and I had the answers, but none of them came out of my mouth. For some reason, my mouth had an agenda of its own, which was: gargle, gargle, gargle, Reapers, gargle, gargle, I'm not going to say anything you're telling me to say brain.

Just stop talking! I was screaming in my head. At this point he had started taking notes, "I'm just trying to get a picture," he said, but that added to the anxiety because now I was like, Why is he taking notes? He’s probably going to give them to me and say, "Get it together Jess!" Nope, he took them with him. When the conversation was finished, I rose from the table feeling paranoid, lost, and dazed beyond control.

How did this happen? How is it possible that I can fully understand my idea, yet butcher it when I try to explain it out loud? I don't know if you've ever felt this way, but it's like, you know the story - you know the plot, the themes, the characters, the twists, the symbolism you've placed throughout, yet still you don’t know how to summarize all of this in a concise way that will do the story justice. Ironically this is exactly how I feel about myself as a human being.

With that said, I left the meeting feeling completely and entirely discouraged. Maybe my story isn't as good as I think it is. But how could that be? I was just drooling over it before I left my house this morning. I'm an avid reader. I know a good story when I read one, but perhaps I am under a delusion spell. I must be blind to what I've actually written. I was now questioning everything, even my skills as a writer. My breaths were constricting, my thoughts were tumbling, it was hitting me like an avalanche. I'm having a panic attack, I thought as I sat in the backseat of Glenn's car.

When we returned to Jersey, I thanked Glenn, climbed into my car, and just sat there for who knows how long. My story totally sucks. And I've forgotten how to breathe. Maybe I should just start over? I thought, but that quickly crashed and burned. I had already fallen in love with my characters and promised them I would tell their story. I can't give up just because a seed of doubt was planted. Right?

So what did I do? I did what I always do when I'm stressed out - I went shopping.

As I'm strolling through the mall with a shirt that I don't need and feeling nonetheless better, a super model, of all people, helped me climb out of this mess. Well, it was actually just a poster in a jewelry story but same thing. Under the woman’s face was a hashtag that read: Don't crack under the pressure. The words reached out and grabbed me. They shook me by the shoulders and said "Stop freaking out! Stop doubting yourself!” It may have just been an ad for diamonds, but it reminded me that despite the anxiety I was feeling, I still believed in my story. And then I realized, I wasn’t freaking out about the opinions and advice I received. I was freaking out because I was afraid of failing. But when it comes to writing, what is failing really? You can’t fail if you’ve learned something. Sure, your book may not be picked up by a publisher, but then you'll self publish, and people will still be able to read your story. I was once told, “If you write a good story, people will freaking read it!” And in the end that's all that matters.

So don't lose hope when you start second-guessing yourself like I did, and definitely don't stop writing. Whatever you do, do not stop writing! (Seriously I'm going to want to read it once you're published) You simply take what caused the doubt in the first place, and learn from it because it is what makes us better writers. And perhaps the lesson you learn won't be about your story, but about you, yourself as a person. That’s what this ride has been for me. I walked into the Liars Club thinking I was going to learn about writing, and I left learning more about myself.

I couldn't have asked for a better experience. Sure it scared the crap out of me, and made me question everything - but that's a good thing! If everyone tells you you're wonderful all the time, then it's probably time to get some new friends. Because real friends tell you when you're doing something wrong and headed in a bad direction. They tell you the things you don't want, but need, to hear. And this is exactly how I feel about everyone I spoke to at the club. To them, I may have just been the babbling girl in the green skirt, but to me they are all my new friends.

There were two things said at the Liars Club that I will forever carry in my pocket (said by Keith and Jon respectively):

"Don't apologize for who you are" and "I'm a f*cking writer!"

About today's guest-blogger:

Jessica Hunter is a book junkie, an aspiring author, a Whovian and a Gryffindor. She dabbles in web development and yoga, but writing has always been her passion. On most days she can be found 30,000 feet in the air, but you’ll also catch her with the South Jersey Writers' Group, at her blog or on her Instagram.

There's Gold in Them There Liars

By Dawn Byrne

The Writers Coffeehouse May meeting at the Willow Grove PA Barnes & Noble struck it rich with Liars. Keith Strunk, Kathryn Craft, Jon McGoran, and Janice Gable Bashman of the Philly Liars Club led conversations on creating believable characters, breaking rules, and more. They answered questions along with author/editor Bernie Mojzes.

Chunks of golden advice surfaced in the form of a ball field and cowboy. Janice and Kathryn explained that a character may do something that seems out of left field. If the reader is clued into something prior in the story that makes the character's action or dialogue believable, even if it's subtle, the reader enjoys tying in the connecting information. Kathryn's example: If a reader doesn't know the character has a daughter, and needs to, then the writer can stage a pink bow in the character's car. She reminded us that left field is still inside the park so it's fair to allow information to come from there.

A character's value system defines how he'll act, and characters are always in character. So force him to act. Jon McGoran said, "If your character's a cowboy, you gotta shoot at his feet to make him dance."

Tertiary characters can reveal much about the protagonist by interacting with him. This can also create visuals for the reader, since a character shouldn't describe himself. Minor characters have their own background, so their actions and dialogue bouncing off the main character can make for thought provoking situations, which draws the reader into the story organically. The protagonist's true grit may surface from this perspective.

Bernie explained that the protagonist is the hero of his own story. Bernie's example demonstrates the difference between a protagonist and antagonist: If Superman is the protagonist, then Lex Luthor is the antagonist. But if it's Lex Luthor's story, he's the protagonist and Superman is the antagonist. Protagonist and antagonist each have good and bad in them.

Using the main character from the television series, "Breaking Bad", Bernie noted Walter White changing from very good to very bad, yet White's end reflects his original goodness.

New writers may do best to follow established rules of writing. Kathryn believes breaking them can make for better writing, so she's doing this with her third book. Bernie agreed that following the rules is best, but sometimes breaking them can blow readers away.

Liars and audience members with marketing background touched on how to go about shopping a project. Top five publishers, where they make all the rules? Or smaller presses who can be more cooperative with authors' ideas on how to get their books into readers' hands?

Other pieces of gold panned from this claim:

"Plot twists have to be inevitable and believable." - Kathryn Craft

"Just because something has to move the story forward, doesn't mean it's a straight line. Satisfying reader's expectations and thwarting them are like the ebb and flow of waves." - Bernie Mojzes

"It's important to see things filtered through the POV character's viewpoint." - Janice Gable Bashman

"A plot need can produce a great character. Example: the character Mike in "Breaking Bad" was a minor character that blossomed because of a plot need." - Jon McGoran

Everyone agreed cutting words from a manuscript always strengthens it. Seriously consider your critique partner or editor's suggestions.

Remember, if you're pulling something out of left field that connects with what you planted earlier in the story, or shooting at your character's feet to see how he'll handle a situation, consider your character's background and beliefs to know how he'll react. It might give your readers that 'Wow, I should've seen that coming' experience. Eureka.

The Writers Coffeehouse is held on the last Sunday of every month and free to all.  

About today's guest blogger:

Dawn Byrne, a grandmother, writes inspirational and fictional stories about families from her New Jersey home. She's a member of the South Jersey Writers' Group, facilitates the Juliette Writers' Group, and teaches Sunday School. Dawn strives to leave a small carbon footprint, reads classical literature, blogs here, and has stories featured in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Devotional Stories for Wives: 101 Daily Devotions to Comfort, Encourage, and Inspire You and Chicken Soup for the Soul: It's Christmas!: 101 Joyful Stories about the Love, Fun, and Wonder of the Holidays . Her website is www.dawnbyrne.yolasite.com.

Writers Coffeehouse for April

By Dawn Byrne

On April 27th Keith Strunk led The Liars Club's Writers Coffeehouse that meets at the Barnes & Noble in Willow Grove PA on the last Sunday of the month. Please note that the May meeting is canceled because of Memorial Day.

Keith is a teacher, actor, author and co-founder of River Union Stage. He wrote the book, Prallsville Mills and Stockton and is one of four authors of The Delaware River Byways that's due out in July. Both are published by Arcadia Publishing. Among other credits is his screenplay Time Lock (2005).

Keith talked about collaborating on fiction books, and suggested all involved in the project should agree on an editor, or a person who will have the final say with the project. A signed agreement can be helpful too. Kerry Gans added her experience collaborating with two other writers on a work yet to be completed. Her poem "The Towers Stood" is included in the non-profit first anthology of World Healing World Peace.

Anyone may ask a question to the facilitator or the group throughout the meeting. Keith addressed a question to the group. He needed tips on how to get back into a long project after being away from it for months. Suggestions were: conditioned/response where the writer repeats daily going to a specific area to write, or uses something like smell to trigger the brain that it's time to work on the writing; re-read the entire manuscript; look over notes on the project; make or review character sketches and the outline; get back into the head of the main character.

The discussion turned to branding. I have to admit I helped with this turn, seeking information on taglines. Keith mentioned that a writer's face is their best logo. An author may want a specific tagline for each book, which can be limiting. A tagline for the author is another option. I found myself in good company with Kerry Gans who also is trying to come up with a tagline that encompasses all the types of writing she does.

As an actor Keith was clearly comfortable explaining how dress can brand a person. It depends on what you write. Carol Kasser shared that as a children's author, she dresses in fun hats and child friendly clothing. Barbara Custer uses a balloon as part of her brand.

This brought up the subject: How to dress for a pitch. When pitching to an agent or editor, says Keith, dress neat but not necessarily formal. If you're nervous, uncomfortable clothing will add to your issues. This topic led to pitching in general.

Keith gave out information on the Philadelphia Writers' Conference coming in June. He mentioned that even though a writer should have a completed manuscript before pitching to an agent, at the conference that's not a deal breaker. As long as the writer has finished most of their book, it doesn't look bad in this situation to have an incomplete package.

I thank our founder and SJWG librarian, Janice Wilson, once again for driving me to the meeting. As always, carpool conversations are a bonus to the information and inspiration I receive during the meeting. Kindren spirits abound on the last Sunday of most months. May may be a bummer, though. I'll have to fill the emptiness with Memorial Day hot dogs and hamburgers.